Cuento Corto (Inglés)
Un pequeño hobbie que tengo es escribir cuentos. Este se me ocurrió un dia que estaba en la parada del pumabus mientras regaban las plantas con agua que olía a cola, y vi que se acercaba una chica guapa. La escribi en inglés por que el final solo me quedó bien en inglés.
Once I heard about a Magic Fountain in the town where I live. It was said that on the fourth day of April, if you were the fourth person to throw a dime into the fountain and make a wish it will become true in that very instant.
April 4th came. Those days I was lonely, I was in search of my true love, I was getting desperate as well. I went early, got my dime ready and waited. 3 people came and made their wishes, I ran to the fountain after the third person went away and threw my dime.
“I wish for true love”, I said.
Inmediately I heard a faint “hello”. I turned around and there she was. The girl of my dreams walking towards me. Time slowed down. I couldn’t believe what I was seeing, those eyes, that face, that hair, that smile.
She was slowly walking towards me ,but then something happened. To my horror a soundless but powerful gas was expelled from my sphincter. She got closer. I was hoping with all my might that it wasn’t a smelly fart, but then it hit me, like a sack of manure mixed with rotten chicken and a big piece of rotten cheese, on the face. It was the most tremendous smell I had ever smelled in my life, it stung my nose like pepper spray mixed with sewer water. I saw her getting closer still through tears in my eyes. I gagged for less than a second, but I had to keep my cool. And then it hit me, What am I going to do?! The love of my life was getting closer and I have the worlds most powerful biological weapon was brewing in my pants!
From the corner of my eye I slowly watched as a fly was plummeting to the ground, and puking as it fell. The horror! A skunk would be a perfume compared to this. What could I do?
But fate has a way to slap you in the face, like a pimp slaps his bitch, and then laugh at you. Just when the girl of my dreams was about to enter the blast radius of my bowel bomb, she turned to the right and waved to another man across the fountain. As I saw her passionately kissing and hugging that man only one thought came to me:
“Here I sat broken hearted, paid my dime and only farted”.